冬祭 The Winter Honour
Original Composition and Performance by Yuwan Zhang
Presented at The Night Temple String Quintet Night Winter Solstice Special Edition, Los Angeles, USA · December 20, 2025.
Participants: All the Audiences
Conductor: Andrew Dalziell
Drum: Shireen Ghosh
Strings: Kaitlin Wolfberg, Julie Pusch, Alexandra Morris, Benz Marston Duglio, Tony Green
Choir: Carisa Bianca Mellado, Persephone Godwin, Ayda Akbal, Alison Lewis, Mia Campagna, Meghan Rose Scott, Lisa Margaroli
Sound: Kenji Nakai
Video: Pat Shafer, Xiaohui Liu, Renata Vontobel, Izumi Hasegawa, The Night Temple Livestream
Photo: Xiaohui Liu, Owen Nathanael
Notes:
This Winter Solstice of 2025, I had the honor of performing my original work "冬祭 The Winter Honour" at The Night Temple. It was a performance with only 15 minutes of rehearsal before the opening. In this piece, the pursuit of “beautiful” or “perfect” sound no longer mattered. Instead, the music emerged through the shared presence of everyone in the space, together creating this moment in time.
After deciding the Chinese name of this piece to be called "Dōng Jì", can be translated into "The Winter" or "The Winter Sacrifice" based on the pronunciation (but different character spelling, as 冬季 or 冬祭), I originally wanted to name this piece "The Winter Sacrifice". But later, l also thought that "sacrifice", in its essence, is an act that allows new forms to be born. When sacrifice points toward renewal, it is no longer mere loss, but a two-sided act of honor. For this reason, the work became "The Winter Honour".
The music contains a great deal of repetition. Yet within repetition, subtle shifts emerge, starting from a single note. These minute changes open new chapters. A transformation may begin as a small thought, a hint of conflict, or a moment of dissonance. But it can take root, turn into action, become language, settle into habit, and eventually lead us onto an entirely different path.
This marked the first time since becoming a composer that I had publicly performed my own work, and the first time I presented a practice that had never been performed in public before. Through this experience, I realized that the scenery I perceive has shifted. Compared to my earlier experiences as a vocalist or a composer, my approach to seeing, listening, and situating myself within the work has fundamentally changed.
As a composer and vocalist, music can be deeply personal to me, but at the same time, an invitation to all listeners and performers. These two dimensions do not contradict each other. Everyone seeks their own meaning within the music. What I hope to offer is an open doorway, an invitation to explore together. For this performance, I composed within an improvisational framework. Each time we play, it sounds different. I only outlined the general direction, and everything else was created collectively in the moment. Before the performance began, I told the audience that they were welcome to join at any time, without worrying about whether their voices were beautiful or correct. I believe in the power of every human presence.
I did not know what shape this journey would take before stepping onto the stage. Perhaps that uncertainty is precisely the meaning of performing and creating. We simply try, together, to play this work. Nervousness and intensity belong to that moment in time. Whether screaming or singing, each sound was simply the voice I needed to release in that instant. There is no right or wrong here, and the only thing that matters is stepping onto the journey.
Through this ritual, I hope that every listener and participant can feel a willingness to let go of certain fragments of themselves, such as “I must hold myself together,” “I must sing in tune,” or anything they wish to transform. We offer these fragments as a form of devotion, and in doing so, embrace the self that is born in that moment.
On the Winter Solstice, when Yin reaches its extreme and gives birth to Yang, the two forces generate all possibilities. Here lies infinite potential. In this winter ritual, through conflict and discomfort, letting go becomes an honor. A new self is born today.
今年冬至，有幸在洛杉矶进行了我的原创作品《冬祭 The Winter Honour》的表演。这是一场只有开场前15分钟排练的表演。这首曲子里，声音的“美丽”与“完美”不再是追求，而是和在场的每一个人，共同创造这个时空。
这首仪式即兴曲最开始以“冬季”作为同音，定名为“冬祭”。但在英文翻译时，我并不想局限于“冬天的献祭”，因为“献祭”这个动作，是为了让新的形式得以诞生。当献祭指向新生，它便不再只是剥夺，而是一体两面的荣耀。所以英文名定为The Winter Honour，直译为“冬日荣耀”。
这首曲子里有大量的重复。但是在重复里，从一个音一个音开始的细微的变化，却开启了新的篇章。那些转变，可能一开始只是一个小小的念头，是一点点的冲突，一个不和谐音，但却可以发芽，转为行为，变成语言，成为习惯，最后展开完全不同的篇章。
这是我成为作曲人以来第一次公开参演自己的作品，而且是之前从来没有公开表演过的风格。然后发现，我眼里的风景，相比曾经单纯是歌手和单纯是作曲的时候，这一次变了。
作为作曲和歌手，于我而言，音乐既是非常私人的产物，但又可以是对所有听众和乐手的邀请。这两者并不冲突，每个人都在音乐里寻找对自己的意义，但至少我想为参与者们打开这扇一起探索的大门。所以这一次的演出，我以即兴为框架创作，每一次都不一样，我只是写下来大概的走向，剩下的都由现场的所有人一起创造。开演前我和观众说，如果你想要加入，随时欢迎，不用担心自己唱得美丽与否。我相信每一个“人”的力量。
这场旅途的地图会绘制成什么样，开场前的我也不知道。但或许这就是我们走上舞台和创作的意义。我们只是尽力想要一齐演奏出这个作品；紧张不已，热血澎湃，都属于那个时空。嘶吼也好，高歌也罢，都只不过是那个瞬间我想发出的声音。这里没有正确，亦无错误；最重要的是，踏上这条旅途。
在这个仪式的过程中，我希望每个听者和参与者，都能感受到自己对于自己的某些碎片的舍弃，比如“我一定要端着”“我一定要唱准”，又或者是任何自己想要改变的。我们把这些碎片作为奉献，然后去拥抱那一刻的，新的“我”。
冬至，阴极生阳，两仪生万物，这里是无限的可能。这场冬祭，在冲突与不适中，“舍弃”，成为荣耀。新的自己，从今天诞生。
Pre-show introduction and post-show interview: